


You’re Gonna Kill Me When You Snap Out Of This (Bisexual Awareness Week)

by totallyrandom



Series: LGBTQ Days [14]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Bisexual Awareness Week, Bisexual Derek Hale, College Student Scott McCall, College Student Stiles, Derek Uses His Words, Fluff, M/M, Scott McCall & Stiles Stilinski Friendship, Scott McCall & Stiles Stilinski are Roommates, Truth Spells, derek loves stiles's hands, derek uses sooooooo many words, truth pollen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-13
Updated: 2016-09-23
Packaged: 2018-04-26 06:59:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4994701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/totallyrandom/pseuds/totallyrandom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Scott. You call me back right fucking now. What the unholy hell is going on with Derek right now? This is … this is NOT RIGHT. Is he possessed? He’s … talking. A lot. And SAYING NICE THINGS ABOUT ME. Really specific, awkward things. What’s going on, man? Am I hallucinating? Call me back right. fucking. now.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Ever since Scott became a werewolf, Stiles’s days fall somewhere along the scale from odd (0) to what-the-everlasting-fuck?! (10). Today starts out at slightly above Beacon-Hills-normal, but pretty soon it’s going to be hovering around all-our-weirdness-knobs-now-go-to-11. 

The day begins with Stiles waking up before his alarm, which like never happens. He hops out of the shower to find a text from Scott saying only “incoming.” _Thanks Scott, so informative, really_. He doesn’t even have time to reply when all of a sudden, Derek’s letting himself in through the living room window of the _6th-floor_ apartment Stiles and Scott share near campus. 

“Hey Derek. I’ll be back in a sec. Just have to throw on some clothes.” 

“Why?” 

“Just got out of the shower, dude. _Some_ of us don’t walk around half-naked when we have company over. Especially those of us who don’t have wolf-enhanced abs.” Derek just lifts his shirt to inspect his stomach before looking back at Stiles and shrugging. Stiles groans and tightens his towel. 

“Right,” he chokes out. “Uh, have a seat or something? There’s juice in the fridge and stuff if you want.” He hurries off to get dressed so he can find out what the fuck’s going on. A visit from Derek is sadly never a harbinger of rainbows and puppies. 

“Why’re your shirts always so big? That’s not the right size. You should wear smaller shirts. They’d look better.” 

Stiles hadn’t had caffeine yet today, so his brain has no response to unexpected sartorial commentary from Derek Everything-I-wear-is-black-and-skintight Hale. “Riiiiiiiiight. So, breakfast?” Derek hums and gives him almost a full smile, jumping them straight to _at least_ weirdness-level-4. Stiles isn’t much for cooking, but he can make them bowls of cereal and even heat up the Pop-Tarts before dropping them on the plate. They eat on the couch, Derek bringing in the coffee when it's ready. Everything about the morning--not the least of which is Derek knowing how he takes his coffee--is already super weird, and it’s barely begun. 

Stiles steals side glances at Derek every couple minutes. Finally he sighs and figures he might as well jump into the deep end. “Derek.” 

“Stiles.” 

“Why are you here?” 

“Scott sent me here.” 

“Scott sent you here. Now? He wanted you to come here right away?” Derek nods. “He sent you here and you haven’t said anything doom-and-gloom yet. … Did he tell you to come eat breakfast with me? Not to make me Google shit for you. Just … to eat?” 

Derek frowns at him in confusion. “No. But thank you for breakfast.” 

Stiles almost passes out from the shock of Derek _thanking_ him for something. He’d never thanked Stiles for saving him from drowning or constantly helping clean his wounds. So thanking him for a bowl of cereal is _super fucking weird_. Like hovering around an 8 now, probably. It doesn’t bode well when his day goes from 0 to 8 in under 15 minutes. 

“Welcome. You, uh … you feeling ok today, dude?”

Derek’s face scrunches up in concentration, like Stiles had just asked him the Final Jeopardy question. Like he’s never had to actually think about it before. Like he might actually say something other than “fine” for once. 

“I’m not injured,” he finally says and follows it with a nod as though finding the statement satisfactory. They’re definitely at 9.5 now. 

_To Scott: wtfs going on dude_

_From Scott: busy it’ll be fine just keep d there_

_To Scott: not cool dude this is like twilight zone fucking weird_

_From Scott: sry g2g_  

Stiles lets out a heavy sigh and pulls at his hair. “What?” he demands, feeling the weight of Derek’s gaze on him. 

“I wasn’t going to say anything. I was just watching your hands. They’re strong hands. Very capable. Now I’m looking at your hair. It’s messy. Like bedhead. It looks good. It looks soft. Like it would feel nice to touch. Also it makes you look like you just had sex.” 

Stiles stops breathing for a second and then runs to the kitchen to call Scott, whisper-screaming at his voicemail, “Scott. You call me back _right fucking now_. What the _unholy hell_ is going on with Derek right now? This is … this is NOT RIGHT. Is he _possessed_? He’s … talking. _A lot_. And SAYING NICE THINGS ABOUT ME. Really specific, awkward things. What’s going on, man? Am I _hallucinating_? Call me back right. fucking. now.” He takes some cleansing breaths and walks back to finish his food. 

Derek is frowning at him, which is about the only normal thing that’s happened so far today. “I’m not possessed. I think you’re right, though. I am talking more today. You’re always very observant. It’s good that you’re in our pack. It makes us safer to have someone smart and observant ... and devious and ruthless. But I worry about you getting hurt all the time. Because you don’t heal like we do. That scares me.” 

“That’s very, um … thank you? For worrying about me? … Maybe we should watch tv or something until Scott calls me back. Unless you can tell me what happened to make you like this? Because this, now, is not, you know … _you_.” 

“When I try to remember, there’s nothing there. I remember I was home alone and the doorbell rang. Then I woke up in the parking lot. Scott was there. He asked me some questions. Then he smelled scared and worried. He told me not to go back inside. He told me to come here until he and Deaton could fix … I don’t remember what. I don’t think they told me? Deaton doesn’t really tell anyone anything, though. Have you noticed that? He’s very stingy with information. It’s _very_ annoying.” 

“Yeah, buddy. Super fucking annoying. … Maybe we should just be quiet and _not talk_ for a while? Because you’re saying a lot. And maybe things you don’t want to. So, maybe we should have quiet time? Just, um, until we hear from Scott.” 

“But I like hearing your voice. It’s nice and deep. Deeper than when I met you. You were very young then, though. You’ve grown a lot. Taller. Broader. The baby fat is gone from your face.” He reaches out to trace down one of Stiles’s cheekbones before dropping his hand. “You look like a man now. You sound like a man. When you talk a lot, sometimes I don’t pay attention to the words. I just listen to the sound of your voice instead. It’s very pleasant.” 

“Hoooooooooooly shit. You’re gonna _kill me_ when you snap out of this. You are going to _fucking_ kill me. ... And maybe Scott for sending you here. Fuck, fuck, fuuuuuuuuck.” 

Derek’s brow furrows. “I’d never kill you. And it’s very unlikely that I’d kill Scott. He’s a good ally now. Most of the time. And he’s important to you. It would make you sad. I don’t like it when you’re sad. … Sometimes you’re sad even when you’re laughing. It’s very strange. I don’t really understand you most of the time.” 

“Oh my god, Derek. Let’s … um … … … … … … Oh, hey! My friend Kai has a shift at the college radio station right now, I think. I’m not usually up in time to check it out. Let’s check it out _now_. Loudly! It sounds best that way! Ok? Ok!” 

Derek just looks at him placidly, seemingly content to go along with whatever Stiles decides for them. It’s fucking unnatural. By the time he hears back from Scott, Stiles’s hands are going to start bleeding from biting his nails so much. It hasn’t helped calm him down that he doesn’t recognize any of the songs Kai’s playing. He couldn’t even distract them by singing along badly. 

“I don’t like this music,” Derek says during a lull between songs. Stiles drowns out any further comment by switching to another station and turning the music up. He doesn’t think he can take hearing about Derek’s music preferences right now. For anyone else, that wouldn’t be private information, but somehow it feels too intimate to let Derek share anything else when he’s clearly not capable of stopping himself. 

Derek’s phone rings and he shuts off the music. “Hi Erica. Are you ok? You don’t usually call me. You usually just send mean texts. If I don’t answer you make Boyd call me.” Alas, Stiles can’t hear her reply. “Yes. Stiles said I’m acting differently. It’s good you noticed. You’re smart. Not as smart as Stiles. The shoes you wear aren’t very practical, and you’re smart enough to know that.” Stiles can’t hear her reply to that either. “No, I didn’t drink truth serum. I don’t think that exists. I think you read too many comic books.” Silence again. 

“No, Erica, you’re not a better beta than Boyd or Isaac. You each have different strengths. But I’m glad all of you are in my pack. But it’s very cathartic to throw you all into trees when we spar. Because sometimes you deserve it. But then I always feel bad and worry about you until you heal. … I think I didn’t want you to know that. Because now you’ll use it against me.” 

Stiles chokes back a laugh and hangs up the phone for Derek, turning the college station back on. He knows he should’ve hung up sooner, but he actually thinks those were things the pack needed to hear. Embarrassing, but good for pack unity and such. Derek really doesn’t ever praise them. 

It’s the top of the hour then, so Kai starts in on campus event announcements. Stiles has zoned out, trying to brainstorm all the questions he has for Scott and Deaton as soon as someone fucking calls him back. He doesn’t realize Derek has turned down the volume until he hears Derek talking back to the radio. Stiles chuckles at that but figures there’s no harm in it until he hears what Derek’s actually saying. All of a sudden he can’t even pull in enough air to laugh. 

“What does that mean, Bisexual _Awareness_ Week? What is that _for_? Do people not know that bisexuals exist? Or do they think people don’t realize they’re not gay or straight until someone tells them about it? I already know I’m bi. I mean, I slept with a few guys in New York, and it was ok. I could be a little rougher with them without worrying about hurting them. So that was nice. But women are squishier, and that can be nice too. Not women like Kate. She was all sharp edges and fire. And not all guys can take it rough. But the big ones I used to find at the gym could. They’d let me bite and scratch and push them into walls.” 

Suddenly, Derek grabs Stiles’s shoulders and says so earnestly that Stiles feels it like an ache in his chest, “No one should be rough with you Stiles. You act tough but you’re breakable. Your bones are delicate,” he says, tracing along Stiles’s wrist. “Like your long fingers. I love your hands,” he groans as Stiles yanks his arm away and covers his ears. It’s not enough, though. He can still hear Derek talking. “I think they’d feel good on me. I think about your long fingers when I’m in the shower. But I’d break you, so I can’t. I can’t be with you. Because no one should hurt you. But I still wish I could feel your hands on me.” 

Derek sighs wistfully. Wistfully! They’re at Code Red, weirdness level 100 now, and Stiles thinks he’s about to die. He turns up the music, but Derek just keeps turning it back down to say nice things about him. So Stiles does the only thing he can think of: He grants Derek’s wish, clamping a hand down hard over Derek’s mouth and telling him not to fucking move. They stay like that for an uncomfortable amount of time, Stiles halfway to straddling Derek in order to reach his face and trying to look anywhere except into his adoring eyes. 

Finally, what feels like _a millionty years later_ , Scott bursts through the door to save him, pulling him back and blowing some yellow powder in Derek’s face. It knocks him out and the apartment is suddenly silent. All Stiles can do is stare back and forth between Scott and Derek. He throws his arms out in the universal symbol of what-the-fuck?! and waits for Scott to clue him in.

“No.” 

“... _No?_ You send me Bizarro Derek from planet Chatty Cathy with no fucking explanation. You ignore my fucking texts. And then you come in here and blow some yellow shit in his face with _no explanation_. What. the. actual. fuck?!” 

“Could’ve been worse.”

“How?!” 

“We caught it before stage 2.” As though it’s totally cool to say that and not follow it up with additional information.

“And?!” 

“Deaton wouldn’t tell me all the details because he thinks it will give you ‘nefarious ideas,’ whatever that means. He’s at the clinic right now running the incinerator to get rid of … whatever it is.” 

“ _Fine_. … So why did you send him here, anyway? Why _me_?” 

“I figured he could live with whatever he told you. You’re good with secrets. If he had gone back to the pack like that … “

Stiles sighs. “Yeah, ok. Good call. It’s already gonna be bad.” 

“Why? What did he say?” 

“Seriously, dude? No way. If he wants to share, he can tell you when he’s normal Derek again.” 

Scott grins at him and claps him on the shoulder. “ _That’s_ why I sent him here, dude! Deaton says he should be ok when he wakes up in about half an hour, but just in case, I’m going back to the clinic before he starts talking about ... Nevermind. Uh, just ... let me know, ok?” 

Stiles makes another pot of coffee and watches Derek sleep. He tells himself he’s just making sure he’s safe, breathing ok. But mostly he’s just _looking_. He’s looking at this beautiful man lying here peacefully for this short time, and Stiles allows himself to imagine being with him. It’ll never happen, of course. Stiles knows Derek will never let himself get close to someone again. He’s convinced his job is to be their protector and that to do that, he thinks he has to be _alone_. 

At least Stiles assumes that’s what’s going on. He’s pretty sure they’ll never talk about it. Derek will probably disappear for a couple weeks and come back and pretend today never happened. So Stiles gives himself this half hour to look and imagine what could have been. 

He leans in close for a moment and Derek turns toward him and smiles in his sleep, making Stiles wonder if maybe he’s wrong. Maybe he’ll have to adjust his scale …


	2. Alternate Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (This is just a link to an alternate ending.)

(I like the ambiguity of how this story ends, but people were asking for more. So if you're interested, go check out [After You Snap Out Of This](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8115751).)

**Author's Note:**

> Bi Visibility Day is September 23. [en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Celebrate_Bisexuality_Day](en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Celebrate_Bisexuality_Day)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [After You Snap Out Of This (Bisexual Awareness Week)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8115751) by [totallyrandom](https://archiveofourown.org/users/totallyrandom/pseuds/totallyrandom)




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